Growing Up Between Two Worlds
- Growing up as a first-generation Vietnamese American in Portland, Oregon, there were high expectations to assimilate into the American culture, which meant fitting in, getting good grades, and not rocking the boat, a concept that was taught by parents, and this approach worked well for a long time 10s.
- As a high school student, life was going great, being a homecoming princess, a four-year varsity basketball player, and a good student with straight A's, but this also meant leaving the most authentic self behind, and there was a whole other part of life that was hidden from everyone, including oneself 1m42s.
- The journey began when a double life was being lived, dating somebody on the basketball team in secret, which eventually led to coming out and feeling like no longer fitting in, but also feeling like a whole world opened up for a more authentic version of oneself to emerge 2m6s.
Setbacks and Reevaluation
- A significant setback occurred when a college basketball dream was shattered due to a blown-out ACL, which was devastating and made it feel like life was over, as the entire identity was wrapped up in basketball, and it was not clear who would be without it 4m30s.
- The freshman year in college was full of despair and turmoil, but while rehabbing the knee, there was also a chance to recalibrate the internal compass, and when the college dream of playing basketball was let go of, it was possible to rediscover other parts of who one was, including a love of art, poetry, nature, and photography 6m10s.
Homesickness and Rediscovery
- When moving away to college, homesickness was experienced, but not in the traditional sense, it was a longing for home cooking, which led to calling Mom to ask for recipes, and then starting to cook in the dorm kitchen, first for oneself, then for others, and eventually cooking large meals for many people 8m40s.
- A girlfriend's suggestion to consider becoming a chef led to a realization that this career path might be the right fit, despite initial reluctance due to parental expectations of becoming a doctor 10s.
Pursuing a New Path in Cooking
- The decision to pursue a career in cooking was met with strong disapproval from parents, who had envisioned a different future, but they eventually offered advice to take on a challenging job in the field for a year to test commitment 2m6s.
- Taking the advice, a job as a "fryer boy" at Red Robin was taken, which involved running and cleaning fryers for 8-hour shifts, and this experience sparked a passion for the work 4m22s.
- After spending 2 and 1/2 years at Red Robin, culinary school was attended, and various roles in fine dining were held, ultimately leading to the position of executive chef at Reed College in Southeast Portland 6m15s.
Reconnecting with Heritage
- A trip to Vietnam with parents, made possible by paid time off, led to a sense of belonging and connection to heritage and culture, and upon returning, a new perspective on life and career goals was gained 8m40s.
Creating a New Vision
- The decision to leave a successful career as an executive chef was made, creating space to dream and pursue new ideas, including the concept of a sports bar centered around women's sports, called the Sports Bra 12m10s.
- The Sports Bra brought together passions for basketball, food, and community, and the concept of "home" was redefined as a place where one belongs, rather than just a physical location 14m40s.
The Journey to Belonging
- Letting go of past expectations and fears is an important part of finding one's true path and sense of belonging, and it is a process that takes practice, courage, and determination 16m20s.
- Building the bra was a process of self-discovery and construction of a sense of belonging, ultimately leading to the creation of a home where one can truly belong 0s.
- The bra served as a symbol of community, acceptance, and space for individuals who have felt isolated, alone, or forced to live a double life, including athletes 10s.
- Letting go of limitations and expectations allows individuals to make room for new experiences and find a place where they truly belong, which is considered the ultimate homecoming 42s.
- The idea of letting go is presented as a challenge to imagine a life without limits, expectations, or fear, and to consider the possibilities that can arise from embracing this mindset 1m30s.
- The core message is that it is never too late to come home and find a sense of belonging, and this idea is encouraged to be taken away as a key takeaway 2m6s.








