Why most public speaking advice is wrong—and how to finally overcome anxiety | Tristan de Montebello

Introduction to Tristan de Montebello and Ultraspeaking 0s

• When people are asked to give a speech, they often switch to a more formal, professional tone, but it is more effective to speak conversationally, as it is more freeing, powerful, and connecting 25s.
• Tristan de Montebello is the co-creator of Ultraspeaking, a public speaking workshop, and became the fastest competitor to reach the finals of the World Championship of Public Speaking in 2017 45s.
• Tristan's experience in the World Championship of Public Speaking led him to develop a unique course that helps people quickly build the skills to become better and more comfortable speaking in public, especially on the spot 51s.
• Becoming a better speaker can be a significant accelerant of one's professional life, which is why this topic is often discussed 1m6s.
• In this episode, Tristan delves into tactics and misconceptions about becoming a better speaker, and also goes through some of the exercises developed by him and his team live 1m10s.
• Tristan and the host go through some of the exercises developed by Ultraspeaking, making the episode more fun and interesting 1m22s.

Personal experiences with public speaking 1m42s

• The guest, Tristan de Montebello, is introduced, and the host shares their personal experience with public speaking, stating that it's something they dread and find scary, despite it not seeming that way to others 2m6s.
• The host mentions that they took an abridged version of Tristan's speaking course, Ultra Speaking, which made them feel more comfortable with public speaking, unlike other courses they've taken 1m56s.
• The host praises Tristan's unique approach to public speaking and expresses their desire to share it with their audience, with the goal of teaching people how to become better public speakers 2m23s.
• The host proposes making the episode interactive by doing some of the exercises used in Tristan's class, and Tristan agrees to participate 2m47s.
• The episode is sponsored by EPO, a next-generation A/B testing and feature management platform, and Command AI, an AI-powered toolkit for support, product growth, and marketing teams .

Misconceptions and meta skills in public speaking 5m35s

• The biggest misconception about public speaking is that people underestimate its transformative power in their lives, as it is a meta skill that can improve various aspects of life, not just the skill itself 5m48s.
• A meta skill, such as fitness, has a broader impact on life beyond the skill itself, leading to improvements in energy, confidence, and overall well-being 6m15s.
• Public speaking is a meta skill that can have a similar impact, affecting how one feels at work, with friends, in groups of strangers, and even with family 6m57s.
• The self-consciousness and anxiety associated with public speaking can make it difficult to realize the potential for improvement and the positive impact it can have on life 7m27s.
• Humans are naturally evolved to speak, and everyone has the "hardware" to be a good speaker, but over time, "bugs" in the "software" can develop due to various experiences and situations 7m50s.
• To improve public speaking skills, one needs to "debug" and "upgrade" their internal software, rather than avoiding the issue or staying stuck with outdated and buggy software 8m40s.
• The key message is that everyone already has the potential to be a good public speaker, and with some effort to improve and overcome anxiety, their entire life can change 8m49s.

Enjoyment as a barometer for effective speaking 8m56s

• Enjoyment is a crucial aspect of public speaking, and if one doesn't enjoy speaking, they're likely doing it wrong, as it's a natural, evolved behavior that should be rewarding 9m21s.
• When speaking feels unenjoyable, it's a sign that something is being done incorrectly, and adjustments need to be made to make the experience more enjoyable and rewarding 9m53s.
• Effective communicators, particularly in business, often appear comfortable and like themselves when speaking, which is a key aspect of enjoyable and successful communication 10m12s.
• In familiar environments, such as with family or close friends, people tend to feel like themselves and find communication enjoyable, which is a state that can be replicated in other settings 10m27s.
• In formal settings, such as business, people often try to control their words and think too much, which can lead to discomfort and ineffective communication 10m51s.
• Using speaking as a barometer to gauge if one is overthinking or needs to relax can help improve communication skills 11m15s.
• Practice is essential to improving public speaking skills, but it must be enjoyable and rewarding to maintain motivation and progress 11m41s.
• Structuring practice in a way that is enjoyable and rewarding, such as through games, can help individuals improve their public speaking skills 11m53s.
• Recognizing that public speaking is a subconscious, flow-oriented process rather than a conscious one can fundamentally change one's approach to improving their skills 12m27s.
• Effective public speaking involves being in tune with the message being conveyed to the audience, rather than focusing on the act of speaking itself, and the goal is to get into a flow state and stay in it throughout the presentation 13m11s.
• To improve public speaking, it's essential to identify and address the root causes of symptoms such as filler words, racing, or monotony, rather than just focusing on the symptoms themselves 13m32s.
• The root cause of having lots of filler words or racing in speaking is often the struggle to feel comfortable slowing down, relaxing, or pausing when the mind is racing, and addressing this issue can help resolve the symptoms 13m48s.
• Feeling constrained in speaking and being monotonous can be due to a lack of certainty or trust in oneself, and proving to oneself that it's safe to be more intense or emotional can help overcome this issue 14m24s.
• Upgrading one's mindset and replacing bad habits with new ones can help stay in a flow state without getting pulled out, and this can be achieved by understanding the root causes of symptoms and addressing them 14m58s.
• Effective public speaking involves taking time to get into a flow state, pausing when necessary, and not rushing to answer questions, as demonstrated by the example of taking time to gather thoughts before responding 15m20s.

Tactical tips for public speaking 15m30s

• To improve public speaking, it's essential to focus on the root causes rather than just the symptoms, and one way to do this is by making a few tweaks to the way you speak, such as changing your physical behavior and speech patterns 15m31s.
• One tactic to make you look better is to think up and to the right when gathering your thoughts, rather than looking down, which can give off a vibe of uncertainty and make you appear less confident 16m20s.
• To make this new habit stick, it's recommended to write "think up" on a post-it note and put it on your computer as a reminder, and after doing it a few times, it will become the new normal 17m32s.
• Another tactic is to "end strong," which means finishing your sentences and thoughts with confidence, rather than trailing off or expressing doubts, which can leave a bad impression 17m54s.
• Research on freestyle rappers has shown that they enter a deep flow state when performing, but their brains tend to "blow up" just before they finish, causing them to lose their flow and confidence 18m11s.
• This phenomenon is similar to what happens in public speaking, where people tend to give a great answer and then lose their confidence and trail off at the end, which can be avoided by practicing the "end strong" technique 18m51s.
• When speaking, people often undermine their own confidence by expressing uncertainty or self-doubt, especially towards the end of their statement, which can negatively impact the audience's perception of their message 19m5s.
• A simple tactic to overcome this is to anticipate the natural increase in self-awareness and uncertainty towards the end of a statement and make a conscious effort to "land the plane" by using summary prompts or making the ending sound conclusive 19m51s.
• Using summary prompts, such as starting a sentence with "so to wrap up" or "in summary," can help the brain fill in the gap and provide a natural conclusion, making the speaker appear more confident 20m22s.
• Staying in character while speaking is crucial, as it can help build confidence and create a positive feedback loop, but people often self-sabotage by drawing attention to their own mistakes or perceived shortcomings 21m12s.
• When speaking, people tend to be highly aware of their surroundings and may feel like they're making mistakes or not making sense, but this internal noise is not visible to the audience, and speakers have a choice to either self-sabotage or stay in character 21m41s.
• Self-sabotage can be avoided by recognizing that the audience cannot see the speaker's internal insecurities and that they appear competent and confident, even if they don't feel that way 22m16s.
• When people are nervous while speaking, they often "leak" and break character, revealing their insecurities and doubts to the audience, which can make the audience start to question the speaker's confidence and abilities 22m40s.
• This can be compared to a pilot interrupting a smooth flight to announce a potential problem, causing the passengers to start worrying and focusing on every little noise or imperfection 23m23s.
• When speakers start to reveal their insecurities, the audience may start to think that the speaker doesn't really know what they're talking about, and may begin to second-guess everything 24m14s.
• The solution to this problem is simple: don't share your insecurities, put your best foot forward, and stay in character from beginning to end 24m37s.
• Staying in character means maintaining confidence and composure, even when things get tough, and ending strong to leave a lasting impression 24m52s.
• By staying in character, speakers can create a reinforcing cycle of confidence, where they start to feel more confident and others perceive them as confident 25m38s.
• Most people look confident by default, and it's often difficult to tell if someone is nervous unless it's extreme 25m57s.
• Many people, including the speaker, are guilty of assuming that others are not nervous, when in fact, most people experience some level of nervousness when speaking up 26m24s.
• When a speaker acknowledges a mistake or a joke that didn't work, it can bring unnecessary attention to the issue and make it more noticeable to the audience, rather than just moving on and letting them forget about it 26m27s.
• This behavior is often driven by the speaker's conviction that everyone in the audience can tell that something went wrong, when in reality, most people might not have even noticed 27m8s.
• By acknowledging a mistake, the speaker is essentially stopping the "train" and pointing out the "crash" to the audience, making them focus on it instead of moving on to the next thing 27m25s.
• The peak-end rule suggests that people tend to remember the end of an experience more than the beginning, so dwelling on a mistake can leave a lasting impression 27m47s.
• Most people in the audience are often in their own minds and might not have noticed the mistake, so when the speaker points it out, it can be jarring and disrupt their engagement 28m0s.
• By not acknowledging a mistake and instead continuing to lead the audience, a speaker can maintain confidence and keep the audience engaged, as most people will forget about the mistake and move on 29m6s.

The importance of practice and games 29m15s

• The Ultra Speaking approach emphasizes the importance of practicing speaking to improve public speaking skills, as opposed to just reading or watching videos about it 29m23s.
• This approach is compared to learning to cook, where one needs to spend time in the kitchen to refine their intuition and skills, rather than just reading cookbooks 30m0s.
• The reason people tend to avoid practicing public speaking is that it can be scary, and there aren't many environments where one can practice speaking safely 30m17s.
• However, the good news is that once one starts practicing, they will get rewarded and find it more enjoyable as they improve 30m54s.
• The use of games in the Ultra Speaking approach is intended to make practice more enjoyable and provide intrinsic rewards 31m5s.
• These games involve short, deliberate practice with feedback, which is more important than the fact that they are games 31m24s.
• The games were developed through experimentation with coaching and testing different approaches, including giving people speech titles and observing their reactions 31m45s.
• The goal of the games is to get people speaking quickly and confidently, rather than spending too much time thinking and losing confidence 32m17s.
• The approach involves compressing the time it takes for people to start speaking, using techniques such as word association to get them to respond quickly 32m27s.
• Developing games for addressing root causes of public speaking anxiety led to the creation of various games, including "Speak Before You Think," a game for people who think too much, which consists of a set of cards with different games. 32m47s
• The magic of games lies in their ability to provide short reps, immediate feedback, practice, and enjoyment, allowing individuals to learn and internalize lessons while speaking. 33m22s
• The games are designed to be enjoyable, rewarding, and adjustable, helping individuals to change their internal feelings and learn through practice and feedback. 33m25s
• The games can be played in a group setting, and sharing tips and advice can help individuals to improve their public speaking skills and build confidence. 34m32s
• Playing the games can lead to a significant improvement in how individuals feel about their public speaking abilities, with some people feeling motivated to take further action, such as participating in Open Mic nights. 34m16s
• The games can be played with minimal coaching or guidance, and individuals can learn and improve through self-directed practice and experimentation. 34m30s

Game 1: The Conductor (Accessing different emotional states) 34m50s

• A game called "Conductor" is being played, where a random title appears, and the player has to speak based on a series of random numbers representing different intensities or states, ranging from 1 to 10, with the goal of tapping into the corresponding energy level 34m50s.
• The game also includes a "breathe" slide, which indicates the player should pause and relax, with the goal of calming themselves down before continuing 36m1s.
• The first round of the game is played, with the title "When I grow up, I want to have taken on all of my weaknesses or all of the emotional things that are holding me back," and the player has to speak based on the numbers and energies displayed 36m30s.
• The player reflects on their life, expressing frustration about still having weaknesses and emotional blockers at the age of 40, and decides to hire a coach to help overcome these issues 36m40s.
• The game is played again, with the title "The greatest puzzle," and the player has to speak based on the numbers and energies displayed, but changes direction and starts talking about knowing what they wanted to do with their life from an early age 38m11s.
• The concept of a puzzle is used to describe how life can be unpredictable and full of different pieces that come together to form a complete picture, with each piece leading to new careers and experiences 38m44s.
• A mindset shift is suggested, from focusing on making sure things work well and look good, to just playing the game and letting things happen, as this can lead to a more enjoyable and fulfilling experience 39m48s.
• The idea of integrating new cultures is discussed, particularly in the context of having a child from a mixed cultural background, and the importance of considering how to provide a balanced experience for the child 40m47s.
• The concept of turbulence is introduced, using the analogy of a flight simulator, where pilots are not just cruising in clear skies, but are instead faced with challenges and obstacles to navigate 42m13s.
• The goal of creating turbulence is to simulate real-life challenges and help individuals develop the skills and confidence to overcome them, rather than just cruising through life without any obstacles 42m44s.
• The importance of not overthinking and just letting things happen is emphasized, as this can lead to a more natural and enjoyable experience, particularly in the context of cultural integration and personal growth 41m33s.
• The idea of "leaking" is mentioned, which refers to the tendency to focus on how things could be improved, rather than just enjoying the experience and letting things happen 42m1s.
• The concept of "hedging" is also mentioned, which refers to the tendency to qualify or apologize for one's actions or decisions, rather than just taking ownership and moving forward 42m7s.
• The goal of handling turbulence in public speaking is to highlight areas that need improvement, allowing individuals to work on them and become more confident in their ability to navigate challenging situations 43m7s.
• Practicing and repeating challenging speaking exercises can help build the skills and confidence needed to recover from mistakes and speak effectively in any scenario 43m20s.
• A quote from Kevin Kelly emphasizes that professionals are simply amateurs who have learned to recover from their mistakes, which is a key aspect of building confidence in public speaking 43m30s.
• Most public speaking scenarios are spontaneous and cannot be fully prepared for, making it essential to develop the ability to think on one's feet and recover from mistakes 43m51s.
• The concept of "file folders" in the mind, where different energy levels access different insights, memories, and stories, can be a powerful tool for public speaking, allowing individuals to access new thoughts and ideas by slowing down and relaxing 44m21s.
• Practicing speaking at low stakes, such as in a low-pressure environment, can help build confidence and prepare individuals for higher-stakes situations 45m12s.
• The idea of doing challenging things with low stakes can help individuals become more comfortable with taking risks and speaking in front of others 45m14s.
• Building confidence in public speaking involves practicing and becoming comfortable with making mistakes and recovering from them, rather than trying to avoid mistakes altogether 45m40s.

Mindset shift: playing the game 45m54s

• The brain's subconscious is incredibly powerful, and getting rid of bad habits and trusting oneself more allows for taking more risks and being more present 45m57s.
• A mindset shift involves playing games that help overcome anxiety and build confidence in public speaking, such as the "conductor" game, which taps into a certain energy that creates emotion and leads to natural words and ideas 47m11s.
• The conductor game involves raising or lowering one's energy to match the desired emotion and conviction, and the words and content will follow naturally 47m47s.
• This game can be played with low stakes, and its effects can be felt quickly, allowing individuals to access their potential and see what it could be like to be in a different state 48m24s.
• The game can be applied simply by having a friend say a series of numbers and matching the energy and emotion to each number, or by using a random series of numbers online 48m44s.
• People tend to have strengths in either high or low energy states, and playing the conductor game can help individuals discover their strengths and weaknesses 49m14s.
• Recognizing one's strengths and weaknesses can provide insight into what it means to struggle with taking up space, being introspective, and asking oneself what they want to say 50m52s.
• Playing the conductor game with a friend can be a fun and insightful experience, allowing individuals to see themselves in a new light and understand their energy and emotions better 49m42s.
• The goal is to have a mirror in front of oneself to understand what's happening internally, rather than just watching oneself on camera, which can be useful but focuses on the outer game rather than the inner game 49m59s.

Game 2: Triple Step (Staying focused amid distractions) 51m7s

• The game "Triple Step" is designed for individuals who struggle to stay focused on a single thought or get easily distracted while speaking, and its principle is to integrate six random words or series of words into a one-minute speech seamlessly. 51m7s
• The goal of the game is to choose a strong direction and stay on that direction as naturally as possible, making the words work for the speaker. 52m34s
• The game requires the speaker to be like a tree in a storm, having a firm solid grounding by choosing a clear direction, but also being flexible enough to integrate the random words without breaking or swinging off course. 54m23s
• The speaker demonstrates the game by giving a one-minute speech on the topic "How would your friends describe you?" and integrates the random words "French fries," "getting them," "massage," "daydreaming," "cartwheels," "microwave," and "the internet" into the speech. 52m41s
• The speaker notes that being a "labrador" type of person, as described by their friends, means being easily excitable and prone to distractions, but also having the ability to explore and experience new things. 52m45s
• The game allows the speaker to give themselves leeway in integrating the words, either literally or metaphorically, as long as they stay focused on the chosen direction. 54m18s
• Practicing public speaking by creating a challenging environment for oneself can make it easier to let words work for you and become more comfortable with things not going perfectly and being distracted 54m57s.
• This skill can be used for building resiliency, as it makes the brain go crazy, and if one can stay composed, it builds the ability to navigate through challenging situations 55m17s.
• Games like "rapid fire analogies" can be used to warm up the brain before a podcast, job interview, or meeting, making it completely lit up and ready for communication 55m51s.
• The standard approach of just giving more talks and presentations is too broad to build specific skills required for great public speaking 56m23s.
• Most people aren't practicing public speaking, and those who are, are already leagues ahead, but might be practicing suboptimally by either doing broad strokes or just memorizing choreography 56m52s.
• The goal is to get people outside of their comfort zones and trust their natural ability to communicate, rather than relying on memorization or choreography 57m36s.
• Practicing public speaking in a challenging environment can help expand one's range and make them feel more comfortable and at ease, unlocking their natural ability to communicate 58m11s.
• The episode is brought to you by Brave search, a private and independent search engine that doesn't bias or censor results, and is available for free to all users on desktop and mobile devices 58m41s.
• Brave search features AI answers, a powerful traditional search engine, and innovations such as fighting bias and SEO spam, a cleaner results page with fewer ads, Reddit threads in the search engine results page, powerful local results, and community-driven ranking options 58m41s.
• The quote "the cave you fear contains the treasure you seek" suggests that the thing that is hardest often points you in the direction you want to go 59m54s.
• This concept can be applied to various aspects of life, such as eating something you dislike but adds value to a dish, having kids despite the pain, growing a beard and maintaining it, and having a sibling despite potential conflicts 59m54s.
• When playing a game of triple step, it's essential to hold on to one direction or thought instead of finishing a thought and moving on to the next one 1h1m11s.
• Approaching fears head-on can make puzzles seem less daunting, and this mindset can be applied to overcoming anxiety and fears in public speaking 1h1m34s.
• The concept of social distancing is mentioned, but not elaborated on in the provided text 1h2m15s.
• The concept of distancing has been a significant aspect of life, especially during times of crisis, and it's essential to evaluate its necessity and impact on individuals and society 1h2m22s.
• People often struggle with deciding whether to get closer to or distance themselves from information, such as the stock market or news, and finding the right balance can be challenging 1h2m36s.
• Engaging in exercises that push individuals out of their comfort zones, like public speaking, can be beneficial in building confidence and overcoming anxiety 1h3m29s.
• The goal of these exercises is not to achieve perfection but to identify areas that need improvement and to learn from the experience 1h3m42s.
• The most valuable experiences are often those that make individuals feel uncomfortable or challenged, as they provide opportunities for growth and learning 1h3m52s.
• Public speaking is a high-performance skill that can be empowering to develop, and taking on the challenge of improving it can be addictive and energizing 1h4m36s.
• Humans have an innate ability to speak, and starting to develop public speaking skills can lead to quick results and a sense of accomplishment 1h5m10s.
• Engaging in challenging exercises like giving a made-up talk can make regular talks seem easier and help individuals develop their skills more efficiently 1h5m41s.
• The process of learning and improving public speaking skills can be energizing and empowering, and it's essential to focus on the process rather than the initial fear or anxiety 1h5m24s.
• People have different comfort levels with various games, and what one person finds easy, another person might find difficult, as seen in the examples of the games "triple step" and "conductor" 1h6m3s.
• Playing these games can help individuals identify their strengths and weaknesses, and understanding what holds them back in one game can also reveal what holds them back in other areas of life 1h6m40s.
• Unlocking the underlying struggles in one game can have a positive impact on other areas of life, much like a set of gears unlocking other things 1h7m2s.
• A valuable lesson learned from these games is to not "leak" how you feel, meaning not to express negative emotions or self-doubt, especially after a performance or attempt 1h7m21s.
• Practicing self-control and not expressing negative emotions can be a powerful tool for personal growth and development 1h7m28s.
• Observers may have a different perspective on someone's performance, and what one person thinks is a failure, others might see as a success or something to be admired 1h7m42s.

Quieting the noise 1h7m51s

• Quieting the noise in public speaking refers to the process of internalizing habits to the point where they become almost imperceptible, allowing the speaker to focus on being present and relying on their body and subconscious to guide their actions 1h7m52s.
• This process involves developing a sense of awareness, similar to a "listener" in programming, that can detect when something is not going as planned and provide gentle feedback to the speaker 1h8m36s.
• The goal is to quiet the internal voice that can be critical and distracting, allowing the speaker to stay in character and focus on their message 1h9m35s.
• As the speaker becomes more comfortable and confident, they can start to receive positive feedback from their audience, which can help to reinforce their performance and quiet the internal voice further 1h9m20s.
• The process of quieting the noise is not about eliminating it completely, but rather about reducing it to a manageable level, allowing the speaker to focus on their message and deliver it effectively 1h7m56s.
• The development of this sense of awareness and internalization of habits is similar to the process of a gymnast learning a tumbling routine, where they must practice and repeat the actions until they become second nature 1h8m12s.

Game 3: Conviction Prompts (Building executive presence) 1h9m46s

• A practical game is being played to work on conviction prompts, which involves entering a state or changing energy to impact the words being spoken, and the goal is to complete a sentence that starts with a given prompt in a way that shows conviction and care about what is being said 1h10m10s.
• The game is designed to help develop executive presence, which is characterized by a sense of gravitas and the ability to convey that one truly believes in what they are saying 1h10m58s.
• Most people in the workforce need to bring more conviction to their words and ideas, as those who speak with conviction are more likely to have their ideas accepted 1h11m39s.
• The game involves completing a sentence that starts with a prompt, and the prompts are specifically chosen to put the speaker in a state of more conviction and force them to care more about what they are saying 1h10m46s.
• The game is not suitable for everyone, as about 10% of people in the workforce may need to question what they are saying rather than bringing more conviction to it 1h11m29s.
• The game is played by getting a random topic and a prompt, and the speaker must start speaking about the topic and complete the sentence that starts with the prompt in a way that shows conviction 1h10m26s.
• An example of a prompt is "I've had to learn this the hard way as an entrepreneur that saying no is one of the most important things I can do", and the speaker must complete the sentence in a way that shows conviction and care about what they are saying 1h12m17s.
• The example prompt is related to the importance of saying no to certain projects or ideas in order to focus on a clear and painful few priorities, which can be a game-changer in terms of productivity and effectiveness 1h12m59s.
• The phrases used in the game are designed to be challenging and help the speaker develop their conviction and executive presence, and examples of phrases include "this matters a ton", "I genuinely believe that every idea is awesome", and "game changer" 1h13m37s.
• A powerful public speaking exercise involves writing down a few words or prompts and then speaking for a minute on a chosen title, integrating those words naturally into the speech to bring out conviction and notice how the content changes as a result of the state one gets into 1h13m55s.
• Choosing a strong direction from the beginning is crucial in speaking, as it generates more ideas and makes everything easier 1h14m42s.
• The goal of the exercise is to advocate for an important idea related to the speech title, and in this case, the title is "space exploration" 1h14m55s.
• Space exploration is considered important to the human race, as it has the potential to inspire and help us discover new things that can benefit Earth, and it's essential to focus on its value 1h15m4s.
• The exercise helps develop new insights and ideas by forcing one to talk and think out loud, and the prompts aid in this process 1h17m2s.
• The prompts used in the exercise were "in fact," "the entire world," "then we cannot forget," "that," "then it astonishes me when," and "finally life-changing" 1h16m20s.
• The exercise can help individuals figure out what they think and know by being forced to get out of their head and articulate their thoughts 1h17m9s.
• The process of speaking and articulating thoughts can lead to new insights emerging and help develop ideas and thoughts that were previously unexplored 1h17m19s.

The Accordion Method explained 1h17m27s

• When people are about to give a speech, they often switch to a "public speaking voice," which can make them sound less natural and less effective, and a more conversational tone is recommended 1h17m37s.
• A helpful prompt to achieve this conversational tone is to "think out loud," which allows the speaker to connect with their audience more freely and powerfully 1h18m21s.
• Most people have a skill set that is more advanced than their mindset, and by changing their mindset to match their skill set, they can make significant progress in their public speaking abilities 1h18m32s.
• To achieve this, it's essential to reduce the stakes in one's mind and focus on speaking naturally, which can lead to moments of connection and insight 1h18m44s.
• Naval Ravikant, in an interview on The Joe Rogan podcast, discussed the importance of discovering the words one is saying at the same time as the audience, which is similar to the concept of "thinking out loud" 1h19m1s.
• Using prompts and cues can help create new ideas and connections that might not have been anticipated otherwise, similar to how constraints can enhance creativity in a project 1h19m30s.
• The goal of this approach is not to encourage people to "make up" talks or be insincere, but rather to build a skill that can be applied to real talks with preparation, making them more effective and confident speakers 1h20m12s.
• The concern that this approach might lead to people becoming "bullshitters" who master communication but lack substance is addressed by recognizing that the goal is to develop a genuine and authentic way of speaking, not to manipulate or deceive others 1h20m26s.
• The fear of becoming a "bullshitter" can sometimes trigger an "immune response" that prevents people from taking steps to improve their communication skills, but it's essential to overcome this fear and focus on developing a genuine and confident way of speaking 1h21m4s.
• To overcome public speaking anxiety, it's essential to develop a skill set that allows you to notice when others are bullshitting and apply the same skill to yourself, enabling you to communicate effectively while having ideas to back it up 1h21m44s.
• The goal is to match the level of communication of a bullshitter but with substance, and to show ideas in the best possible light, which requires effort and practice in one's craft 1h22m9s.
• Noticing and calming the voice that reacts to bullshitting can be beneficial, and spending time learning skill sets can help, as they are likely atrophied due to avoidance 1h22m36s.
• Developing this capacity can serve as a powerful compass, allowing you to trust your instincts and stay true to what you know 1h22m53s.
• Various techniques and principles have been shared to help improve public speaking, including online games that teach helpful techniques 1h23m9s.
• Two methods for developing talks are the accordion method and the bow and arrow method, which can be implemented to create better talks 1h23m34s.
• The accordion method is a way of preparing speaking that revolutionizes the traditional approach, which involves dumping ideas on paper, rearranging them, and trying to make them into a talk 1h25m1s.
• The old way of preparing talks is considered broken, and the accordion method aims to innovate on this by providing a more effective approach to preparing speaking engagements 1h24m44s.
• When preparing a talk, people often create a large stack of paper with ideas, then struggle to condense them into a script, which can be difficult to memorize, as humans are not naturally good at memorization 1h25m20s.
• The traditional method of preparing a talk by writing and memorizing can be compared to redecorating a living room by rearranging and adding items, which can be overwhelming and lead to a cluttered space 1h26m55s.
• The accordion method is a different approach that involves preparing a talk by speaking, using time constraints to create extreme clarity and understand the essence of the talk 1h26m29s.
• The accordion method can be compared to redecorating a living room by removing all non-essential items, leaving only the most important pieces, and then intentionally adding back in certain elements to create a clear and minimalistic design 1h27m18s.
• To use the accordion method, one can start by writing down ideas on paper, but then switch to speaking, using time constraints, such as speaking for three minutes, to get ideas out into spoken word 1h28m19s.
• When using the accordion method, there are two rules to follow: stay in character the whole time and end strong, with the goal of getting ideas out into spoken word, regardless of how bad it sounds or how many mistakes are made 1h28m46s.
• The "accordion method" is a technique for crafting a speech by starting with a three-minute version, then condensing it to two minutes, one minute, and finally 30 seconds, to identify the essential pieces of the talk 1h29m9s.
• This process involves repeatedly editing and refining the content to eliminate unnecessary information and focus on the core message.
• Once the 30-second version is achieved, the process is reversed, expanding the talk back up to three minutes, with the goal of creating a clear and intentional speech 1h30m4s.
• By using this method, the speaker can internalize the talk, rather than just memorizing it, and develop a deep understanding of the content 1h31m10s.
• The accordion method allows for flexibility and adaptability, enabling the speaker to navigate different time frames and make adjustments as needed 1h31m27s.
• This approach can help speakers overcome anxiety and deliver a confident, effective presentation 1h32m16s.
• The method involves cutting out unnecessary information, such as long introductions, and focusing on the most important and engaging content 1h32m7s.
• By concentrating on the key nuggets of information and building on them, speakers can create a compelling and memorable talk 1h32m0s.
• When preparing for a talk, the amount of time spent preparing depends on how familiar you are with the content, but a rough go-through of the material a week ahead of time can be helpful to get a clear sense of what you want to convey to the audience 1h32m59s.
• It's not necessary to write a script, but rather to write down the foundational pillars that support the main point you want to share, which can be thought of as bookmarks or cues that will help guide your speech 1h33m25s.
• Having some bullet points or core points written down before a talk can be helpful, such as the main point you want people to remember and the three bookmarks or pillars you want to hit 1h33m57s.
• The accordion method is more powerful than memorizing and doing it the old way, and it involves compressing and expanding your content to internalize it rather than memorize it 1h34m31s.
• Using the accordion method, you can break down your content into key points, such as describing the old way, the new way, and the takeaway, and use these as bookmarks to guide your speech 1h34m35s.
• Having 30 seconds to prepare can be enough time to recall your bookmarks and deliver a coherent speech, as long as you have internalized the content rather than just memorized it 1h34m53s.
• The accordion method can be particularly useful when you have to give a talk on short notice, as it allows you to quickly prepare and deliver a effective speech 1h35m45s.

The Bow and Arrow technique 1h37m57s

• The "bow and arrow" technique is a mindset shift that helps individuals focus on what they want their audience to remember, rather than what they want to say, when preparing a talk or presentation 1h37m59s.
• This technique is based on the idea that people tend to remember only one thing from a talk, and that it's powerful to focus on that one thing when building a presentation 1h39m5s.
• The "one thing" is referred to as the "arrow," and it's a single sentence that the audience would remember if they left the talk 1h39m25s.
• Having a clear "arrow" gives the speaker clarity and direction, and it also gives the audience clarity 1h39m40s.
• To make the "arrow" more impactful, it needs to be "notched" in the "bow" by adding weight to the sentence, which can come in the form of an interesting anecdote, data point, or story 1h39m54s.
• The process of clarifying the "arrow" is a back-and-forth between the "bow" and the "arrow," and it may involve rewriting the "arrow" and refining it 1h40m33s.
• The goal is to limit what the audience remembers to a single, clear idea, which gives the speaker and the audience extreme clarity 1h41m37s.
• When preparing a talk, it's essential to identify the one key thing you want the audience to remember, as they are likely to recall only one thing if anything at all 1h42m0s.
• To achieve this, determine the main point you want to convey and then gather supporting evidence to convince the audience of its validity, making it more likely to stick with them 1h42m9s.
• This approach can be applied both to the overall talk and to individual slides, ensuring each slide has a clear and focused message 1h42m22s.
• If a slide lacks a clear main point, it may be a sign that the slide is trying to convey too much information and should be revised or split into multiple slides 1h42m42s.
• A common symptom of not having a clear main point is a slide with too much information, which can cause the audience to lose focus and zone out 1h43m7s.
• To gain clarity and reduce the need for preparation and memorization, apply this approach to each slide, and consider making the title of the slide the key takeaway you want the audience to remember 1h43m13s.
• By putting the main point directly in the title, you can clearly communicate to the audience what you want them to learn from that slide 1h43m27s.

Final thoughts and encouragement 1h43m43s

• The importance of tackling public speaking anxiety is emphasized, as it can be a transformational experience that can positively impact one's life, particularly for those who feel constrained by their speaking abilities 1h44m0s.
• The more constrained one feels with their speaking, the more transformational overcoming this constraint can be, leading to a more enjoyable and fulfilling experience 1h44m17s.
• Tackling public speaking anxiety can be an exhilarating and energizing experience, giving individuals the feeling that they can take over the world once they embark on this journey 1h44m31s.
• Encouragement is given to everyone to take the first step and start practicing their speaking, as it can lead to personal growth and a newfound sense of confidence 1h44m37s.
• Practicing public speaking can lead to feelings of being energized and motivated, with a desire to continue improving and practicing one's speaking skills 1h44m46s.

Lightning round 1h44m55s

• The book "The Big Leap" by Gay Hendricks is highly recommended as it explores the idea that people tend to self-sabotage themselves when they experience too much success or happiness, which is linked to internalized messages from childhood experiences, such as the "tall poppy syndrome" where the tallest poppy is cut first, and offers a solution to overcome this by creating an upward-facing spiral with no upper limit 1h45m9s.
• A favorite TV show is "Peaky Blinders", an English show with Cillian Murphy, which is considered a true masterpiece, and a favorite movie is "The Nice Guys" with Ryan Gosling and Russell Crow, which is a brilliant comedy 1h46m29s.
• A favorite recent product is the Ember Mug, a physical product that keeps drinks warm at a desired temperature for a long time, which can be controlled through an app, and is loved for its ability to keep coffee or tea warm for a long time 1h47m3s.
• A favorite life motto is "These are the good old days", which reminds people to enjoy the present moment and not be too future-focused, as it is easy to look back and think that past times were better, and encourages people to appreciate the current moment 1h47m47s.
• The journey to the World Championship of Public Speaking lasted almost seven months and was the craziest journey of the speaker's life, as they went into it with no experience speaking and had to outwork everybody to climb the ladder 1h49m8s.
• Six days before the semifinals, the speaker had finally unlocked a speech they thought was worthy of giving on the final stage, but after testing it in front of 50 people, they realized it was not good and nobody cared about it 1h49m32s.
• The speaker received 50 pieces of feedback, but most of it was unhelpful, with people wishing them good luck for the semifinals, which made them feel like they were going to humiliate themselves 1h51m52s.
• The speaker experienced waves of anxiety, threw their speech away, and rebuilt a completely new speech from the ground up in five days, using the best of everything they had explored and experimented with over the course of three months 1h52m7s.
• The new speech was built like a standup comic's special, focusing on different areas and using the jokes that worked the best 1h52m30s.
• The speaker had to have two speeches ready for the semifinals and finals, both of which had to be world-class, and they had to be prepared to give a completely different speech on the final stage if they won 1h50m2s.
• The speaker filmed every single speech they gave, over 100 speeches, and asked for feedback from everybody to improve their performance 1h50m42s.
• Michael helped the speaker get an opportunity to speak in front of 50 people to test their speech, which was a crucial moment in their journey 1h50m27s.
• A speech was given in front of one person, the district director at Toast Masters, to practice and internalize the speech before the semifinals, despite being meant for 500 to a thousand people, and it received a positive reaction with a tear rolling down her cheek 1h52m42s.
• The speech was built in five days and led to a win at the semi-finals of the World Championships, which was a significant confidence booster 1h53m42s.
• The experience showed that the preparation and practice were worth it, and it worked in achieving the desired outcome 1h53m39s.
• To learn more about Ultra Speaking, people can visit Ultraspeaking.com, where they can experiment with some of the techniques discussed, and sign up for a five-email series that goes deeper into the topics 1h54m27s.
• Listeners can be useful by applying the techniques discussed, practicing them with others, and sharing their positive experiences with others, which would help spread the word about Ultra Speaking 1h55m12s.
• People can also follow Tristan de Montebello on Twitter @Montebello to ask questions or provide feedback 1h54m51s.
• The podcast host encourages listeners to subscribe to the show, give it a rating, and leave a review to help other listeners find the podcast 1h56m8s.